2 Bites

On Monday night I was called into work to help recover an open heart patient. Desperate for help, I called my mom to help with the little chickens, since G was at work too. MeMe was quick to oblige. And by oblige I mean- let Hudson eat ice cream for dinner and stay up until midnight.

Anyways, MeMe and Hudson had a lot of fun. And, MeMe helped teach Hudson about how old he would be on his birthday- 2 bites. 2 bites (years) = 2 bites of ice cream. Duh.

That is not a typo. MeMe gave Hudson 2 bites of ice cream, because he would be 2 (bites) on his birthday.

Obviously, I was thrilled when I came home, after a long night of work. Thrilled. But. When the help is free, you cant complain. So. Thanks, MeMe.

 

Tonight, our baby turned 2. Officially. 2 bites. It was perfect. Friends and family helped us celebrate our precious Hudson. Oogoo-gi.

He was happy. And perfect. I am beaming. I CAN NOT believe that my BABY is 2. I'm a mess, really. I feel pride, happiness, fear, and sadness- all at the same time. Where are the fucking tissues? Cant you see a Mama is crying over here?!?!?!?!

 

 

the karaoke machine he got from my in laws.....

nothing says thank you like a drum set or spray paint (for my nephew)....

or a paint ball gun.... you better sleep with one eye open....

I am so thankful for all my friends and family. It truly takes a village to raise these animals- without you all, I would be lost.... I love you, all.... But seriously, watch out. Karma is a bitch.

Happy Birthday Hudson, Mommy loves you. Despite the karaoke machine, you are still my favorite.

Loves.

Not yo mama's thanksgiving

A thanksgiving retrospect, if you will.

My year started off with resolutions, goals, and promises. It ended unexpectedly, unforgettably.

This year for thanksgiving, my family and I decided to actually give thanks. And by give thanks I don't mean, gather round the table and indulge in a lavish meal. I mean GIVE thanks.

My mom and I decided to run the turkey trot for charity and donate our thanksgiving meal to the local food pantry.

So. Early morning came. And despite the chill, the day was gorgeous. My mom and I chatted while we trot, gave our thanks and went home to enjoy pizza and wine- milkshakes for the kids.

It was a wonderfully easy, stress free, and still delicious holiday. And I didn't have to do any cooking or dishes. Yep. I think we have a new thanksgiving tradition.

How was your thanksgiving? Hope you enjoyed all the dirty dishes.

Happy Holidays,
From WI, with love-

Hide and Seek

Miracle

Is it a miracle? Or did Hell just freeze over?

Kennel Cough

Just like dogs at the dog pound, we are all sick in the Schuey house. And by we, I mean- me. Everyone else has been sick and is now better. Now, I have kennel cough.

Lucy brought some kind of booger home from school- and it spread like wild fire. Thanks public school. I was cranky with this situation for about one minute, and then I had parent teacher conferences. My entire outlook on this 'kennel cough' has changed.

You see. While nursing my entire pack of wolves back to health, I had been dreading Lucy's parent teacher conferences that were looming. Lucy fought me every morning before school and every morning I shipped her off to school as she screamed at me with tears in her eyes. In fact, just this morning, I literally opened the front door and shoved her out- just in time for the bus. Only to remember later that her parent teacher conference was tonight. Perfect.

Don't worry. I kept myself plenty busy through out the day, trying not to think about what awful things Mrs. Betsy had in store for me. Our kennel (house) has been full of sick puppies keeping this mommy puppy pre-occupied.

The time came. I packed all the puppies up and headed back to school. G and I sat down, in miniature chairs, at a miniature desk, and waited. Lucy and Hudson played in the classroom and broke the hamster cage. As Mrs. Betsy patiently saved the classroom hamster and fixed the broken cage, she started to give us the REPORT.

In all seriousness, it wasn't as bad as I was preparing myself for. Lucy, apparently, is a very fun and bright 4 year old girl. She can spell her name, cut on the lines, and identify shapes and colors. Apparently, Lucy and Mrs. Betsy have not had any brawls and Lucy hasn't called anyone in her class a douche bag. This is where normal parents would start to brag about how smart, and perfect, and wonderful their children are. Don't. Worry. I'm not going to do that. I know better. All I wanted to hear from Mrs. Betsy was that Lucy showed her human side while at school. And she does. All we can do as parents is hope that when our children are out of our care they are polite and manageable.

So. If I have to endure kennel cough to help bring out the human in Lucy, then bring it on. It is worth it. Because if she can be human for 4 hours a day while at school, then there is hope. Hope that her demon side will one day subside, making way for a nice, coat wearing, human child.

P. S. Mrs. Besty did mention the coat issue. We came to an understanding and I think we have finally put that to rest.

Until next parent teacher conference...
-Mama Schuey

You Asked

Dear Ricki Lake Show,

I am writing this blog letter in response to a twitter message I received from you earlier this week. You asked me what it would take for me to change my views on your show. You asked. It took me a minute. But I have an answer.

I am a stay at home mom to 3 crazy kids. My husband is a firefighter/paramedic and I work as an ICU nurse part time on the weekends. I am also working on my Master Degree. Yep. I'm nuts. I know.

My days are filled with Spongebob Square Pants, Sesame Street, algebra homework, alphabet practice, children's books, and a whole lot of love. Every now and then, in the middle of my insane day, I find a few minutes of quiet to myself. Sometimes, I like to channel surf.

On November 6th at approximately 1:19pm central time, I found myself sitting on my couch, sipping coffee and enjoying the peace and quiet that came with nap time. I flipped on the TV and started surfing. I came across your show and was immediatley disappointed. You see, while mother nature was destroying lives on the east coast and America was discussing it's immediate future with Election2012- you were having a pajama party. It seemed a little out of touch. Now, I will admit, my disappointment didn't allow me to watch for more than a minute. That's what lead to my twitter comment about your show.

~When did Ricki Lake get another shot at a talk show? It was a mess the first time around. Now we have to bare witness again? #WTF

Was my comment a little harsh. Yeah. But that's me. I'm pretty raw. I'm even more sarcastic. My husband tells me I need a filter. Its something I'm constantly working on. Sorry.

I cant tell you the last time I sat and watched a talk show. Mainly, because- like I mentioned before, my days are filled with other things. But. I do feel like there are plenty of talk shows on TV that do nothing to better anybody. In fact, most of them suck. Don't get me wrong. I like me some sucky TV every now and then. Its just, there is plenty of crap already available. Why not be better?

Why not focus on "real" reality? Real people. Real stories. Real issues. Real conversations.

As a woman, as a mother- I want to teach my children about compassion, charity, love, service, hard work, and dedication. I want to teach them to value education. I want them to ask tough questions. I want them to explore new ideas. I want my sons to respect women. I want my daughter to look up to me. I want to be a role model. I don't think pajama parties teach those lessons.

We as women are way more capable then pajama parties. We are capable of changing the world.

So. You asked me:

~What would you like to see on the new show to change your views?

I want to see inspiration. I want to see women working together to make a difference in the world. I want to see moms, like me, talking to other moms. Sharing. Laughing. Growing. Learning.

There is so much more to life than pajama parties. Lets not ignore life. Lets not hide from reality. Lets face it head on. Together.

That's what I would like to see. Hell- I would even make my kids nap to watch that.

You said you'd listen....

Best of luck with your new show.
From Wisconsin, with love-
Mama Schuey

Blue Dreams

After waking Lucy up this morning, she asked me-
"Mommy, did Bobock Bamama win?"

"Yes- my little blue child, he did. Praise Jesus." I beamed.

She smiled and started to tell me all about the dream she had last night. Something about princesses and puppies. While she chatted on about her dream, I took the opportunity to distract her- with her winter coat, and a lesson.

"Lucy, do you know who else had a dream? Martin Luther King. He had a good dream. He dreamed about sharing, and being nice, and not hitting your baby brother...."

It was at that moment that I realized she had stopped listening to me and was onto my attempts to stear her moral compass and keep her warm.


Oh well. I tried.

Winter Coat War: Season 2

It is officially freezing here in Wisconsin. I am always shocked when winter comes back. Like, maybe one year it wont and I will be blessed with a warm season that wont require any fights with Lucy about wearing her coat.

You see, Lucy thinks that she is impermeable to cold. Or, she doesn't believe me, or the weather man, or her own 2 eyes. She refuses to accept the fact that winter is here. She refuses to wear her winter coat.

And so, every morning the battle ensues. A battle to the death of my spirit. Lucy cries. I cry. The dog watches, with her head cocked to the side. And in the end, the bus driver comes to take a proud and coat less Lucy to school. And there I stand in the front doorway of my warm house, in my pj's, defeated and embarrassed. Thank god that embarrassment doesn't last long and that Hudson is able to snore through the daily war we fight. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to crawl back into bed and dream of children who listen, smile, and wear winter coats.

So. After yet another winter coat battle, me loosing, and crawling back to bed, Lucy came home from school with this note in her backpack.

I was only shocked that it took this long before Lucy's teacher questioned my parenting skills.


To Mrs. Betsy-
I have had this battle with Lucy since she tore her way out of my uterus. She is a fighter. And she is used to winning. I am weak and pathetic. I choose my battles. And I have chosen to let her freeze, in hopes she will one day come (shivering) back to me, begging for forgiveness. Thank you for your help. I am always available if you have any questions and/or concerns. I am also always willing to discuss arrangements (baked goods, money, etc...) to keep social services out of my hair. I have no patience for that. And I can be very ugly when I am angry.

P.S. Lucy loves being in your class and my husband and I look forward to parent teacher conferences next week. I promise to always put Lucy's coat in her backpack. Best of luck getting her to wear it.

Thank you,
Amanda

Voting

Today, Hudson and I voted. We were voter #268. Today we voted for his future. A future full of promise. A future where affordable education is possible, for everyone. A future where anyone can marry, and be proud of it. A future where women have a choice- have a voice. A future where healthcare is easily accessible and affordable. A future with jobs and security. A future offering hope, charity, and compassion. A future to look forward to. A future to plan on.

 

 

Today, we voted to make a difference. What did you do?

Halloweekend

Everyday at our house is Halloween. Lucy changes her clothes 100 times a day- never quite satisfied with the level of fashion or drama she is expressing. So Halloween was extra special this year. Why? Because she got to dress up AND leave the house!!!

It took Lucy about 1 second to decide what she wanted she wanted to dress up as- Rapunzel. It was perfect. She had gotten a dress up set for her birthday this year, and it included Rapunzel. I love when the pieces of the puzzle just fall into place without any effort on my part.

But, as always, there was a problem. Halloween in our little town isn't just one day. Its a whole damn weekend. Great. As if dressing your kids up and hauling them around for one day wasn't enough, lets do it 3 times! Thank god I work weekends. Halloween was G's problem.

Halloween day 1: The setting a crisp, fall Saturday. I was working. I called home to check on things. I asked G what his plans were for the day. He responded with, "Uh, I'm getting Lucy ready for her Halloween party. Remember???"
Me: "Oh shit! No, I forgot. I don't have a gift. What is she wearing? Did you brush her hair???"
G: "She is all dressed. She is that pink and purple princess. She wont let me brush her hair. Do we really need a gift?"
Me: "Bring her to me. Bring her hair box. Yes. You need a gift. I will take care of it. Somehow. See you in a bit. Don't forget the hair box!"
G: "Yeah. Whatever."

I had 30 minutes to get my act together and help G pull this off. My plan- run to the hospital gift shop and make a girly 5 year old gift out whatever they had.
I was able to score a princess card and princess art set. And it only set me back $13.58. Perfect.

30 minutes later, G and the kids stroll into the ICU. G looking annoyed. Hudson happy. And Lucy dressed in her old, torn Cinderella dress up dress. Her hair- in last night's braids and a MESS.

Me: "What happened to Rapunzel?"
G: "Don't ask. Who cares. She is this princess now. Who is this anyways?"
Me: "A broke ass, bum Cinderella. Lucy- will you let mommy fix your hair?"
Lucy: "NOOOOO. I like my braids!"
Me: "Okay then. Here is the gift. Best of luck. Mommy needs to get back to work, kisses. Now get out."

Halloween day 2- Neighborhood trick or treating. Me at work. G home with the kids. Hudson crying because he didn't want to dress up. And Lucy as Snow White. Duh. Who else???

 

G said that they made it around the neighborhood for about 45mins before Lucy got cold and refused to walk anymore. Sounds about right.

 

 

Halloween day 3- Halloween Party at Lucy's school. Great. Another day of fighting with Lucy on what to wear. She decides to go with Snow White, again. I was able to wrangle some leggings on this time. Thank God. Its freezing here, in the FROZEN TUNDRA. Lucy has a blast at her party. Only problem. Now she wants to be Snow White everyday for school. Awesome. I cant wait for parent teacher conferences.

 

 

More pics from Halloweekend Hell

 

Finally giving up- handing out candy on our front porch, wrapped in a blanket.


Happy Halloween!