What? No ice cream cake?!?

I got a sea kayak for my birthday!
I got a sea kayak for my birthday!
I got a sea kayak for my birthday!!!

I have been dropping hints to the hubby about wanting to try kayaking, for a while now. Garth loves me. I know he does. But he can be a real boner when it comes to birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries, and gift giving. Now, this mama, she loves to give presents. She loves getting them even more. Except when they come from Garth. From him, cash is usually best.

Examples.
First Christmas as a couple- gold necklace. I don't love gold.
First birthday married- no gift. Marriage. Baggage. Snoring- apparently are now all considered gifts.
First Christmas married- nervous, I make a Xmas wish list. A WHITE gold dress watch. I got a YELLOW gold watch.
First Anniversary- a baby. No gift. OK. Lucy was a gift. But not from Garth. Maybe a little from Garth. Where is the cash?
Second birthday married- I can't remember. Must have been great.
Second Christmas- mama's Xmas stocking is empty. Again.
Valentines Day (the next year)- mushy love card, with cash inside. Finally.

Are you seeing a pattern?

I have definitely caught on to this guys game. I'm on to him. When I really want something, I need to buy it myself, or ask my mother in law. She gets its. Gets it right. Every time. You know why? Because she asks you what you want. And she gets it for you.

This year. I told her about my kayaking dreams.

Enter this photo.

I thought it was my birthday?

No worries, my dream catcher of a mother in law got us each one. I realized what a good idea that was once I saw G try to get in his kayak.

Before G and I hit the open water, I thought I should do a little research. You know- RTFI: read the fucking instructions. Here are some helpful tips I found on the Internet.

This is how G got in and out of his kayak.

This is scary. But hilarious. Thank God Boppa Tim took all the whales out of the lake.

Great Idea. Pissed I didn't think of it first.

I think that's it. I think I am ready.

I just need to watch out for humpty dumpty as he gets in and out of his kayak.
Keep an eye out for whales.
And avoid swimming pools. And idiots.
Perfect.

P.S. G said he bought me a new house for my birthday this year. With out sounding spoiled, I would have loved an ice cream cake. In his defense, I only told him about the cake thing once or twice. But, there is always next year. Or. Maybe you should just stick to cash. I will buy my own ice cream cake.

Loves.